TEMPTATION ISLAND
I just watched the re-run of Temptation Island.
And a thought sprung into my head.
--> Nothing is for certain in this world.
That applies to everything. And I mean everything.
Embrace moments of today that might not mean anything now.
For one day, those moments will be the most splendid and precious to you.
Take my word for it. I'm bearing the consequences of my oblivion now.
Thursday, August 01, 2002
IMAGINATION
I'm starting to doubt that imagination is a gift.
Seems more like a curse to me.
Imagination is often related to creativity.
And that is GOOD.
Owning an imaginative mind, transports you to different
worlds you'll never get to explore in REALITY.
You get to paint on a bigger canvas,
Instead of being confined to a piece of drawing block.
BUT, BUT, BUT ..
Imagination often brings about paranoia in me.
Things that may not happen, I imagine it to be.
That encourages unfounded accusations.
Then I experience an erratic rush of feelings and emotions.
ohgoodnessgraciousme ..
If I claim to love myself, why do I let myself go through this?
Do I really love myself?
hmm... a thought just ran through my head.
Maybe, I'm starting to freak out because,
For once in my 20 yrs of existence,
I'm loving someone as much as I love myself,
If not, more.
Don't disregard that "maybe" in the beginning of that sentence.
I'm starting to doubt that imagination is a gift.
Seems more like a curse to me.
Imagination is often related to creativity.
And that is GOOD.
Owning an imaginative mind, transports you to different
worlds you'll never get to explore in REALITY.
You get to paint on a bigger canvas,
Instead of being confined to a piece of drawing block.
BUT, BUT, BUT ..
Imagination often brings about paranoia in me.
Things that may not happen, I imagine it to be.
That encourages unfounded accusations.
Then I experience an erratic rush of feelings and emotions.
ohgoodnessgraciousme ..
If I claim to love myself, why do I let myself go through this?
Do I really love myself?
hmm... a thought just ran through my head.
Maybe, I'm starting to freak out because,
For once in my 20 yrs of existence,
I'm loving someone as much as I love myself,
If not, more.
Don't disregard that "maybe" in the beginning of that sentence.
IMAGINE THIS
--> You're given the ability to read someone's mind.
Gosh that thought appeals to me.
Without doubt that would be the greatest form of invasion.
But this mind just refuse to rest.
Perhaps by knowing, it will stop giving reasons to
The heart to strive on.
You can never be too sure of
Words that come out of the human's mouth,
A white lie to some of them,
Is the biggest, hypocritical lie to us.
And for some ...
EGO stands in the way of their inner feelings.
A desperate attempt to recover their outlook
Hides the real them.
We are often conceived by people.
I guess we just gotta learn to trust.
Maybe some things are hidden from us
For the better.
--> You're given the ability to read someone's mind.
Gosh that thought appeals to me.
Without doubt that would be the greatest form of invasion.
But this mind just refuse to rest.
Perhaps by knowing, it will stop giving reasons to
The heart to strive on.
You can never be too sure of
Words that come out of the human's mouth,
A white lie to some of them,
Is the biggest, hypocritical lie to us.
And for some ...
EGO stands in the way of their inner feelings.
A desperate attempt to recover their outlook
Hides the real them.
We are often conceived by people.
I guess we just gotta learn to trust.
Maybe some things are hidden from us
For the better.
Monday, July 29, 2002
SHARING MY DEEP THOUGHTS
In our daily quests to chase things we sought after,
We often forget to give praise to our creator,
Many times we complain about being alone in this world,
When the truth is, HE was always there looking out for us.
Hurdles in life were put before us for a reason.
To test our faith, strength and determination.
HE will never burden us with problems, HE knew we cant overcome.
HE knows our capabilities to surmount any ordeals.
Besides, we can always ask for HIS guidance and help,
Should we feel overwhelmed and lost.
Instead, we, the arrogant ones, choose silly ways.
Suicide. Sulking. Anger. Wailing. Revenge. (besides others)
We want the rosy and beautiful things in life,
Yet, we dont abide by HIS rules and take HIM forgranted.
We become obsess with this temporary place called EARTH.
And forget why we were sent out here.
EARTH resembles a little theme park.
We collect tokens (good deeds) along the way
To ultimately win the BONUS prize. (an eternity in heaven)
Dont you think so?
In our daily quests to chase things we sought after,
We often forget to give praise to our creator,
Many times we complain about being alone in this world,
When the truth is, HE was always there looking out for us.
Hurdles in life were put before us for a reason.
To test our faith, strength and determination.
HE will never burden us with problems, HE knew we cant overcome.
HE knows our capabilities to surmount any ordeals.
Besides, we can always ask for HIS guidance and help,
Should we feel overwhelmed and lost.
Instead, we, the arrogant ones, choose silly ways.
Suicide. Sulking. Anger. Wailing. Revenge. (besides others)
We want the rosy and beautiful things in life,
Yet, we dont abide by HIS rules and take HIM forgranted.
We become obsess with this temporary place called EARTH.
And forget why we were sent out here.
EARTH resembles a little theme park.
We collect tokens (good deeds) along the way
To ultimately win the BONUS prize. (an eternity in heaven)
Dont you think so?
Sunday, July 28, 2002
SHACKLES
"In the corners of my mind
I just can't seem to find a reason to believe
That I can break free
Cause you see I have been down for so long
Feel like the hope is gone
But as I lift my hands, I understand
That I should praise you through my circumstance."
"Everything that could go wrong
All went wrong at one time
So much pressure fell on me
I thought I was gonna lose my mind
But I know you wanna see
If I will hold on through these trials
But I need you to lift this load
Cause I can't take it anymore"
"In the corners of my mind
I just can't seem to find a reason to believe
That I can break free
Cause you see I have been down for so long
Feel like the hope is gone
But as I lift my hands, I understand
That I should praise you through my circumstance."
"Everything that could go wrong
All went wrong at one time
So much pressure fell on me
I thought I was gonna lose my mind
But I know you wanna see
If I will hold on through these trials
But I need you to lift this load
Cause I can't take it anymore"
LIMBO
limbo n 1: the state of being disregarded or forgotten [syn: oblivion] 2: an imaginary place for lost or neglected things.
This is the state I find myself trapped in.
It doesnt have to be this way. I know that.
It sux to the max.
When you have 2 extreme ends --
TO LEAVE or TO STAY,
You ultimately have to make a decision, whether to your liking or not.
But when you are caught in the middle,
Staying seems so stupid yet leaving is not an option.
Was talking to Grace a few days back,
She advised me to carry on with my life and not hold back.
She understands my position.
Always nice to have someone who understands.
Perhaps theres some thruth to this ..
"If you are meant to be, fate will bring you closer again"
No point forcing yourself. You can't change destiny.
But I've been thinking ..
What about those people with failed marriages?
Or those with fucked up husbands, who beat them up?
Was that their destiny?
Or did they fight against fate to be with the one they loved..
But loved all wrong?
-wonders-
Sometimes I wonder ..
Am i too young to think about all these things?
I am only 20.
But I'm so afraid of making mistakes.
I want to know for sure.
Then again, people learn better through their mistakes. Dont they?
Maybe it just scares me ..
Why something so beautiful cant be mine?
Am I not special enough?
What am I lacking so badly?
Is it my actions? Or is it my words?
Could it even be physical? Or perhaps emotional?
It might not even be me.
The problem might lie in you.
So what are you afraid of?
limbo n 1: the state of being disregarded or forgotten [syn: oblivion] 2: an imaginary place for lost or neglected things.
This is the state I find myself trapped in.
It doesnt have to be this way. I know that.
It sux to the max.
When you have 2 extreme ends --
TO LEAVE or TO STAY,
You ultimately have to make a decision, whether to your liking or not.
But when you are caught in the middle,
Staying seems so stupid yet leaving is not an option.
Was talking to Grace a few days back,
She advised me to carry on with my life and not hold back.
She understands my position.
Always nice to have someone who understands.
Perhaps theres some thruth to this ..
"If you are meant to be, fate will bring you closer again"
No point forcing yourself. You can't change destiny.
But I've been thinking ..
What about those people with failed marriages?
Or those with fucked up husbands, who beat them up?
Was that their destiny?
Or did they fight against fate to be with the one they loved..
But loved all wrong?
-wonders-
Sometimes I wonder ..
Am i too young to think about all these things?
I am only 20.
But I'm so afraid of making mistakes.
I want to know for sure.
Then again, people learn better through their mistakes. Dont they?
Maybe it just scares me ..
Why something so beautiful cant be mine?
Am I not special enough?
What am I lacking so badly?
Is it my actions? Or is it my words?
Could it even be physical? Or perhaps emotional?
It might not even be me.
The problem might lie in you.
So what are you afraid of?
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